about love

Credits of this photo do not go to me.

I was just thinking about this topic… that of LOVE.
That four letter word that almost everyone craves but many do not dare to admit that they need and want it.

Many girls (and guys for that matter) have long lists about how their perfect partner will be like, what attributes they will have or just how handsome or beautiful they will be..
but at the end of the day,  many will tell you that you can have as long a list as you want but more often than not,
you will end up dating someone who doesn’t fulfill your criteria..

That I believe, is true to a certain extent.
Let’s face it, no one is perfect.
If there was that someone, we would have known about it.
Even the most beautiful actresses have drug habits or smoke.
They can cuss and swear.
Even the most handsome actors or sportsmen, have times when they lose their temper.
And, because no one is perfect, we CANNOT expect that our other half will be..
but that, doesn’t keep us from dreaming about a guy so handsome that he makes you weak in the knees, so gentlemanly and kind, always taking care of your needs…..
in short, romance.
Every girl wants to be treated like a princess by their other half, to be loved and cherished, put in first place, to always be taken care of..
and that sometimes leads to the absurd criteria that we have towards our other half…

I was just pondering about this the other day that I came to this conclusion: that we will never find the perfect guy… (even if we do it’s often impossible for you and the guy to be together.) but we can find the PERFECT GUY for us.
The guy whose flaws you can accept and not get upset over, the guy that you love with your whole heart and not compare him with others. The guy whom you’re willing to take care of and give him your all.
What I think girls look out for is not a guy that is good in all ways, but rather, a guy who if is lacking in knowing how to be gentlemanly and such, will make and effort and be willing to learn how to be gentlemanly, to do things that will not make us upset, to hold us in their arms if we are upset, to be there for us…
Similarly, we as girls cannot just expect to receive and give nothing back in return but in fact, we have to care for the guy, not make unreasonable demands, care for his family, not nitpick at everything, to also be their pillar of support in their down times just like they are for us.

Love is give and take…
and loving someone is to accept them for who they are.
We must learn to never ever take the person who loves us for granted… it would be a shame if we only learnt how to cherish after we have lost.

I remember how at one of my friend’s wedding, the pastor mentioned this very important thing..
That love means doing whatever the other person likes and spending quality time together..
Like for example, if the girl’s favourite past time is shopping, the guy cannot just say that “ok, I’ll drop you off and come back to pick you later”… or that “ok, I’ll wait for you at Starbucks”. Love is you actually following your wife and girl friend into the shops and giving her sincere opinions if she asks for it.. cause when she does that she actually really wants your say in her life..
Before you guys flame me and say what about guys????? I shall also say that the pastor also mentioned that if the guy’s favourite past time is to play computer games then the girl can also attempt to pick up the game even though she may not like it.. because this is showing love.
Even if the wife really loathes the game, she should also spend quality time with her husband by being in the same room as him and well maybe watch him play?
In short, spending quality time together doing each other’s favourite activities.

Your spouse or your boyfriend/girlfriend should be your bestfriend.
The one you can confide in about everything.
The one whom you should be truthful with (in that way all the melodrama from korean/taiwanese/hong kong dramas would be non-existent causing viewers that much less angst.)
The one whom you should tell about everything first.
A relationship and a marriage doesn’t only take love..
That is only the beginning as well as the foundation.
A relationship and a marriage takes work. Loads of it. From both parties.
Take time to go back to your first love with your spouse or bf/gf time and time again.
Bask in the joy of having someone who loves you.

To end off,
here’s a very familiar bible passage…

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.
It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

These are just some thoughts of mine… so please dont flame!



I must be crazy to be up at this hour cause of this

As the title says, I must be crazy to still be awake at this hour (1:48am) just because I decided to look through my past blog posts and was appalled that I was more insightful last year than this year… And that my pictures have almost dried up( a picture a day scheme: ultimate fail.)

Sigh. Year 3 sem 1 really got me down!
In this remaining 25 days of the year, I’m gonna reflect, take more beautiful pictures and make life count!